That Smurf or That Smurf?
by Packrat Smurfette
Summary: "Well it's been a rough week. I go over to my friend Painter's studio, and we end up smurfing [kissing] each other. Then I go to my friend Farmer's hut, and he drunk smurfs [kisses] me! What the Smurf is going on?" Well, people pair Vanity with Farmer all the time, yet they forget about Painter who needs some love. Come on guys. Anyway. hope you enjoy. Don't own Smurfs.


**Don't own the Smurfs.**

Ever since she came, half of my use isn't needed anymore. When they need creams, they go to her. When they need flowers for alchemy, they go to her. When they need someone for eye-candy, nope not me, her. I walked through the village like normal, trying to ignore her presence. I think she called out to me, but I ignored her as I continued to walk.

"Hey Van'ty! How ya Smurfin'?"

I looked away from my mirror to see Farmer.

"Oh hello Farmer! I'm smurfing fine. By the way, when will your cucumbers be ripe? I need to make some skin cream."

"Oh! They're done, I can drop some off at your house tonight if ya want."

He was one of the few Smurfs who still offered to carry things for me.

"Oh that would be just smurfy Farmer! Thank Smurf you're here."

"By the way Van'ty, can you smurf me some cream?"

I smiled and nodded, then we said goodbyes. Besides Painter, Farmer's the only one who still relies on me for creams and such. In a better mood, I walked back to my hut. It was a bit messier than I like, so I decided to clean up a bit. I know I'm perfect, but my shroom should at least look half as good. As I cleaned, I heard a knock. As I said come in, Papa walked in.

"Vanity, can we talk about something?"

"Sure Papa, is something bothering you?"

"I've heard somesmurfs talking about you ignoring Smurfette, is something wrong between you two?"

As I dusted my shelf I clentched my teeth. I didn't want this conversation.

"It's fine Papa, nothing serious."

"Vanity, you can tell me if something's wrong you know."

I was about to ask him to leave, something Smurfs rarely did, when I heard a knock, and Farmer walked in with a crate of cucumbers.

"Hey Van'ty here's the cucumbe- did ah smurf atta bad time?"

"Oh no Farmer, I think Papa was about to leave anyway."

Papa gave me a worried glance, but nodded as he left the door. Farmer walked to the kitchen and placed the crate down.

"Thank you Farmer, I don't know what'd I smurf without you."

"Gee Van'ty, it's no problem."

As he left, I swore I saw a blush on his face, it must've been me though. I decided to clean the first batch of cucumbers as I saw my door open, and my best friend Painter walk in.

"Vanity! How are 'ou?"

"Oh Painter! I wasn't expecting to see you today, do you need a model?"

As I posed he quickly noded and asked if I'd come in about ten minutes. He said he needed to go ahead and set up. As he left, I swore I saw a blush on him too... Strange.

Anyway, I grabbed a tote and put things I'd need in, sometimes we stayed so long I ended up sleeping over. As I arrived he quickly found a pose he liked, and we talked for hours about random things like weather, what we like, even Gargamel winded in the conversation somehow. I happened to look over his features. His skin was a bit lighter than usual Smurfs, but his face had some discolored parts, most likely from paint. I wonder why I never noticed before.

At one point when I was completely stiff, we decided to go on a walk. We took our usual isolated path to the dam, tracing our footprints from earlier that week. At one point when we were at the dam, we just sat on a stump and listened to the animals. Eventually it got dark, so I stood up.

"Painter, it's getting dark, she should start heading ba-!"

The next thing knew, I was pushed against a nearby tree, and he crashed our lips together. The scent and taste of paint overwhelmed me as he held me tightly, and explored every part of my mouth. I was too shocked to fight, but later it felt... Smurfy. I snaked my hand up his back and pushed his head closer. He smirked and seperated our lips, stroking the side of my face.

"I take you liked it mon amour?"

My face must've been extreamly purple as I blushed and nodded.

We walked back with purple tints on our faces, but talking like nothing happened. He set up some pillows in the corner for us, but he said he wanted to paint for a bit before he slept. I just nodded and dozed off.

...

Since I stayed over at painter's studio, I didn't get the time to start the cream, so I had to work on it all day. At eleven though, I finally finished. I knew Farmer would still be up, so I decided to head over and give him his cream. As I predicted, he was up, I could hear him cursing about never being able to find his acorn brandy. I knocked and walked in, and I could clearly tell he was drunk. His hat was askew, and he walked with a crooked step each time. He smiled as he saw me.

"'Hey Van'ty, didn't expect to see ya here."

"Just came to drop your cream off Farmer."

He smiled and took it, placing it on the table. I noticed his skin was a bit dark, most likely tan, and he had some muscle. He yawned loudly and glanced at me.

"Hey Van'ty, mind helping me up?"

Even though he was partially walking up, he was heavy. He stood by himself when I let him go, and I started to walk off when I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me from behind.

"Van'ty... Ain't anysmurf tell ya how smurfy ya are?"

"F-Farmer?!"

The thing I felt behind me made me feel even more creeped out. I tried to get out of his grip, but he was strong. His hand tilted my head toward his.

"Like how ya smell like cucumbers and honey, and how smurfy you look..."

Before I could object, he connected our mouths, and god he salivated a lot while drunk. The scent and taste of brandy was overwhemling. I kept trying to get out, but he kept me in place, until he crossed the line by touching my tail.

*SMACK*

He looked at me with a goofy and surprised face as I stormed off with a face that was as purple as a purple Smurf's. and locked the door behind me. I brushed five times and took a LONG shower...


End file.
